June 26. The spirit of Del-Boy Trotter hung over The Apprentice
in Paris: dismal schoolboy French, dodgy products, dipstick decisions...
bonnet de douche! The task – to flog British goods to the Frogs
– was won and lost over child car seats that turned into rucksacks.
More accurately it was lost by Melody, a woman pushier than a
rugby prop who makes David Walliams seem modest and self-effacing.
Team leader Tom sent Mel ahead to do market research; but she
hated the car seats and manipulated the results to suit her opinion,
lying like a cheap watch. French people “don’t use cars very much,”
she assured him, after speaking to four commuters outside of a
Metro station. So Team Tom ended up selling a bone china teapot
lamp and a postcard you could grow watercress on. (Who makes this
stuff, the Mighty Boosh?)
Tom is bright, but he’s as weak as a Chinaman’s tea. He let
Mel walk all over him, and would struggle to sell umbrellas
in a downpour. Tom made Amy Winehouse seem together. Luckily,
Leon was even more useless. Leon spent the task gormlessly fretting
that he wasn’t contributing much because he couldn’t parlez
Francais without noticing that Mel was mostly parlezing English.
D’oh. Susan, who led the opposition, seemed to think the French
were an alien race, asking idiotic questions that may or may
not have included “Do the French eat their own children?” Yet
she had the sense to choose the convertible car seat, which
Helen pitched superbly netting a whopping order worth more than
It was all over for Team Tom. In the boardroom, Melody was
exposed as a rude, domineering liar – Sugar loved her. While
Tom was exposed as the idiot who’d played rock, papers, scissors
over a vital pitch. In the rock, paper, scissors game of life,
Tom is Edward Scissorhands. I can’t see him, or buck-passing
Jim winning – although I do want to watch Jim get torn apart
by Sugar’s inquisitors. Surely a woman will triumph this year,
and just as surely it won’t be Natasha, Susan or the miraculously
*SO to sum up, Melody is bi-lingual, Natasha is apparently
bi-sexual, and Edna seemed borderline bi-polar.
* KARREN Brady is a poor sub for the sainted Margaret; given
her links with Avram Grant it’s hard to see how she’ s got the
front to lecture anyone about bad decisions.
HAYLEY Cropper slammed a door on Corrie. “That’ll be the testosterone,”
quipped Sylvia, who’s struggling to cope with the fact that
her daughter-in-law was born a bloke. She’d put their lack of
kids down to the menopause. “Hayley’s been through the change
all right,” sniped Tracy. “A flaming sex change.”
*When Hayley star Julie Hesmondhalgh was pregnant for real
in 2001, everyone had to pretend not to notice this medical
miracle. This was around the time when the Croppers ran off
with Wayne. I believe the Gazette headline was ‘Kid Disappears
In Tranny Snatch’.
DO you ever think there just aren’t enough gay chat-show hosts
on TV? Why on Friday nights there are only three of them. Producers
must be trawling Old Compton Street with nets. Razor-sharp Graham
Norton makes the others seem redundant. Not only is he very
funny, he’s actually interested in what people have to say.
Paul O’Grady is in the wrong slot (not for the first time);
without Lily, he’s like Samson without his hair. Alan Carr would
turn Louie Spence straight. He talks like he’s chewing a cocktail
sausage (and I cleaned that up.) Worse, his show is lazy and
predictable. Gay is okay, dull is unforgiveable. Des O’Connor
was more fun. If he’d bitten the pillow he might still be on
*WITH chat shows in the pink, Winton’s Wonderland must be
in with a chance of revival. I’d give Craig Hill a shot, but
I suspect we’re more likely to get Toilet Talk with Louis Walsh.
HOT on TV: Kate Winslet in Mildred Pierce (Sky Atlantic)...
Game Of Thrones finale... Emilia Clarke... America’s Got Talent
ROT on TV: Three Men Go To Venice – far canal... Odd One Out
– call my duff... The Marriage Ref – misses and misses... Supernatural
– putting the suck in succubus.
I COULDN’T bring myself to watch The Marriage Ref again, not
after last week. You want us to take relationship advice from
Geri Halliwell? Why? Was Jim Davidson unavailable? Who next?
Sarah Ferguson? Ashley Cole? Jeez.
*CHERYL and Ashley: the Ex Factor. Although she denies it.
*LOOSE Women’s viewing figures have plummeted since Janet
Street-Porter joined the show. Surely not? They did try and
book someone more likeable but Rose West wasn’t available.
MERSEY Shore will be the next ‘reality’ TV show. Same cack,
different accents. Let’s hope the Scouse House defies convention
and books someone with half a brain. Imagine it: Kenny has taken
Kara upstairs and he’s showing her something she’s never seen
before; it’s large, it’s hard, it’s... a book.
*REJECTED TV spin-offs: Terry Pratchett’s Come Die With Me
home kit. Gok Wan vacuum cleaners, Gok Suckers. 8 Out Of Ten
Cats Cantonese cook-book. Jason Gardiner pizzas – they come
with extra topping...
*I’D like to see Katie Price on Fake Or Fortune: “Oi, Fiona,
these are fake but they’re worth a fortune.”
*THE EastEnders producer hints that he’ll bring back big names.
Who? All the great characters are either dead or played out.
I’d rather see Jack The Ripper back than sad-sap Charlie Slater.
*PLANET of the Apemen concerned an early hostile human species
that were dim but extremely violent. For more details, see Phil
*NURSE Jen on 24 Hours In A&E had a patient who’d been shot
in the penis. The thought of it had made her laugh for an entire
shift. It certainly put lead in his pencil.
SMALL joys of TV: Emma Hawkins’s heels (Four Rooms). Ruth
Wilson’s lips. Kathy Griffin. Collagen and male waxing infesting
5th century Camelot, and those famous mixed-race knights of
*THINGS I’d like to hear on Camelot: “Hey, Guinevere, that’s
not a sword in the stone but don’t stop pulling it.”
RANDOM irritations: Newsnight making Paxman discuss vajazzles.
BBC sitcoms – doing for laughter what Wimbledon’s centre court
cover does for Cliff Richard sing-songs.
*TOP 5 forgotten sitcoms that were actually worth watching:
Thick As Thieves, Brass, In For A Penny, Comrade Dad, The Brothers
*THOSE Kardashians haven’t half changed since they were on
Star Trek. I’m sorry, that was the Cardassians. Strange, predatory
humanoids with odd-looking faces... that’s both of them.
June 19. Hurrah! Luther is back and it’s madder than an Ascot
hat. Cleared of murdering his wife, maverick cop John Luther
has taken to starting his day with a cup of coffee and a quick
game of Russian Roulette. Now that’s what I call breakfast Cheerios...
The plots are definitely Fruit Loops, though. Luther is working
for a new police department which may as well be based in a
Marvel comic. His latest adversary is a costumed serial-killer
who models himself on the Victorian super-villain Spring-heeled
Jack. “Murder by theatre” is his game. The callous swine slashes
his victims like Jack The Ripper while wearing a Punch mask,
and carries out his dirty deeds via a live webcam stream so
he can give the watching cops a running commentary. “He’s taunting
us,” says Luther, demonstrating the razor-sharp powers of deduction
it takes to make DCI in the Met these days.
There’s a sub-plot involving faked snuff movies and a hooker
who lets herself be gangbanged while unconscious (an idea they
took from Geordie Shore). Mad Alice, who killed her parents
last series, is still around. Luther pops along to the nut-house
for a bit of banter with the sexy psychopath, played with lip-licking
glee by Ruth Wilson. He even appears to chuck her a security
swipe card hidden inside an apple. Maybe he needs her criminal
genius to net the killer, or warm his bed, or in the absence
of Terry Pratchett load his early morning revolver.
Disappointingly ‘Jack’ doesn’t appear to have actual springs
on his heels, but he can materialise mysteriously in the backseats
of cars - a stunt that would baffle Penn & Teller. The whole
show is barking, and its morals are often muddier than Glastonbury.
But Idris Elba as moody Luther makes it work. Last series he
took on a Satanist who liked to write scripture in blood, and
a fake cabbie who couldn’t get it up unless he’d just topped
a passenger – talk about leaving the driver a tip. It’s reassuring
to know that wherever unlikely killers strike, John Luther is
there battling for justice, between bouts of extreme depression.
MANY viewers are angry about Choosing To Die on the grounds
that it might encourage suicides, and we’ve already got EastEnders
for that. The climax of Terry Pratchett’s documentary saw Peter
Smedley, 71, an affable English gent with motor neurone disease,
being given a lethal dose of poison in a Swizz clinic and popping
his clogs on screen. It was moving propaganda, complete with
tears, compassion, chocolate and Elgar’s Nimrod. But it was
also about as well-balanced as a one-legged man with cramp on
a tightrope in a force nine gale. Pratchett didn’t tell us that
one in five Dignitas ‘customers’ don’t have a terminal illness,
they have depression. He didn’t ask if legalising ‘assisted
suicide’ would encourage abuse. Or consider whether rich elderly
relatives might be conveniently talked into it.
*DID you see that shock death on TV this week? It took my
breath away. How could they do that to Ned Stark? Game Of Thrones
keeps getting better.
*THE assisted suicide/murder scene on Pratchett’s show provoked
mixed reactions. Some were shocked, some saddened. John Stape’s
using it as his screensaver.
NO mention of Greece or Syria on 8 Out Of Ten Cats, but Sean
Lock did nail that dimwit Facebook juror: “Never mind right
and wrong, she looks like she doesn’t know the difference between
right and left.” Jon Richardson made a decent debut as team
captain, imaging the Milibands united at the despatch box like
Jedward (“Deadwood”). But Jimmy Carr had the quip of the night,
noting: “Not only has Ryan Giggs been in someone who’s been
in Big Brother, but his brother has been in someone his big
brother has been in.”
HOT on TV: Our War (BBC3)... Idris Elba (Luther)... Tamson
Egerton (Camelot)... Castle (Five)... new Dexter (FX).
ROT on TV: Michelle Collins (Corrie) – Cindy Beale? No big
deal... Graeme & Xin’s leaving scenes – I couldn’t give a crispy
fried duck... King Of – the opposite of Room 101, more like
MUCH pioneering work was done by The Sex Researchers, or as
they’re known these days the Giggs family. Episode one focused
on Victorian views of female sexuality, including concepts like
‘womb furry’ and ‘menstrual madness’, still evident today on
Loose Women. Some feared the series might be just more C4 titillation,
but nothing says serious like a Robert Webb voice-over.
THE Arthurian legends are tales of chivalry and courage. They
are vital, potent inspirational British folklore. Camelot takes
them and reduces ’em to a bonkathon. (Came-a-lot, apparently...)
Still, there are a couple of things about Eva Green that weigh
heavily in its favour.
*Top 5 TV brunettes: 1) Eva Green 2) Belinda Stewart-Wilson
3) Sophie Winkleman 4) Imogen Thomas 5) Funda (Made In Chelsea)
*NO-ONE in Corrie commented on Stella’s strange Manc accent,
mind you they’ve still not noticed David Platt is from Yorkshire.
*HAS that geezer from Taggart turned up in Weatherfield cos
these days there’s always a mur-dah?
*RICKY Grover will play Heather’s love interest on EastEnders.
He’s already saving up for the rings: 35 of them, all deep-fried
*BBC4’s documentary on Stalin revealed ‘Uncle Joe’ to a brutal
dictator who created his own legend while ruthlessly shafting
friends and enemies alike. Basically, he was Simon Cowell with
RANDOM irritations: Bruce’s knighthood. TV’s bleeding heart
inability to reflect public anger over revolting creeps like
Nigel Leat. Dave Walliams, Wall Of Fame? Wally of Lame, more
like. The BBC’s desecration of its White City studios, and its
one-sided, wrong-headed campaigns (for the Euro, for assisted
suicide, against England etc etc).
SMALL joys of TV: C5 restaurant inspector Fernando Peire.
Penn & Teller. Angry Boys (BBC3). The Shadow Line finale, despite
being as confusing as Father’s Day in Walford. And Dermot Monaghan
on Eggheads offering surprised male contenders “Your last chance
to knock one out.”
SEPARATED at birth: Nigel Lythgoe and Larry Grayson – one
camp, absurd and prone to parrot ridiculous catchphrases, the
other Larry Grayson.
June 12. POPSTAR To Operastar poses the question no-one else
would think to ask: will ITV be able to take some washed-up
chart warblers and bring out the inner Caruso in them? To which
the short answer is no of course not, don’t be daft. There’s
more chance of Ryan Giggs keeping it in his trousers than of
some former Pussycat Doll being able to rattle off the Appassionata
after a few hours with Katherine Jenkins and a crate of stout.
Real opera singers train for years. But that doesn’t mean the
show is bereft of joys. No-one who saw Alex James’s version
of The Barber Of Seville last year could easily forget it. I
think the barber was out and we got The Plumber Of Seville instead.
Alan Titchmarsh has gone this time. Shame. I know he’s only
a gardener, but there’s always been something of the Tosca about
him. Gone too as judges are renowned opera buffs Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen
(soft furnishing expert) and Meat Loaf (a giant ham). In their
place are Vanessa Mae (violinist) and Simon Callow (actor)...which
suggests the producers are just picking names randomly out of
a hat. Maybe next year we’ll get Bobby George and Natasha Giggs
(Madam Unbutton-Fly.) Mercifully we’ve still got Rolando Villazon,
who comes across as a demented CGI hybrid of Mr Bean and a Muppet?
The judges bend over backwards to avoid actual criticism.
Katherine told gurning nightmare Melody Thornton “you do sexy
very easy with your body.” Yeah, but what about the singing,
Kath? Rolando congratulated Joe McElderry on an “almost chaka,
chaka, chaka performance.” (What?) While Callow noted that Midge
Ure’s bizarre Scottish-Italian version of Questa O Quella (Pava-Grotty)
had “great charm.” Unfortunately his character is supposed to
make Dominique Strauss-Kahn look like a eunuch house husband.
Callow is the master of damning with faint praise. He told Cheryl
Baker that although technical criticisms of her singing were
true “I was indescribably touched” (a lot like Imogen Thomas,
then.) But Cheryl won over the audience, without even having
to rip off her sequinned ball gown, Eurovision style. Chezza
*THERE’S a new batch of hopefuls tonight. It won’t be over
until Claire Richards sings.
* WAYS to improve PTO: 1) Kim Woodburn as Brunhilde 2) June
Brown as TuranDot Cotton 3) Fill audience with largo louts 4)
New round: Deep Sea Divas 5) Have Melody get to grips with Andrew
*THOSE live C4 doctors’ clinics are a god-send for celebrity
love-cheats. Now when the missus catches them on Skype with
their pants down, they can snap: “Do you mind? I’m having a
*DANNII Minogue has been voted TV personality of the year.
Dannii? A personality? Blimey. Trailing in behind her were Alan
Titchmarsh’s trowel, Mary Taylor’s coconut macaroons and a broken-down
C4’s Comedy Gala? Good cause, big names, nowhere near enough
laughs. Micky Flanagan and Kevin Bridges impressed but are lazy
Jo Brand and lacklustre Shappi really the “cream of British
comedy”? It’s hard to believe that three hours of the best available
mainstream comics would have delivered such feeble fare. Comedy
now is all about cheap shock and right-on platitudes. It makes
you nostalgic for the sheer class of Bob Monkhouse and the innocent
charm of Russ Abbot’s Madhouse.
*JASON Manford on Andy Gray: “Imagine losing your job for
something you did off air...”
SIMON Cowell insists that nothing on Britain’s Got Talent
was fixed, apart from his teeth, hair and face obviously...
It’d be easier to believe if his pop music company didn’t manage
the winning acts, if the running order were decided by drawing
lots. And if all finalists got equal levels of support. The
singers get choreographers and backing singers, why not furnish
Les Gibson with comedy writers?
HOT on TV: Our War (BBC3)... The Mentalist finale (C5)...
Injustice...Eva Green (Camelot)... Lee Evans (Comedy Gala) –
ROT on TV: Popstar To Operastar – Verdi on the ridiculous...
In With The Flynns – out with the commissioning editor... Embarrassing
Fat Bodies – embarrassingly thin programming.
WHEN Bobby Davro arrived in EastEnders he ran down Shirley.
When David Essex got there, Carol Jackson ran into him. It’s
obvious which celeb they should recruit next: Alvin ‘Green Cross
Code’ Stardust! The Square is a death trap – see Jamie Mitchell,
Tiff, Danielle, Ashley Cotton...
*EDDIE Moon is accused of murdering his wife. Kind of brings
new meaning to ‘Hold me close, don’t let me go’. Ed will be
punished for it though. They’re lining him up for a fling with
*GAZ slept with Charlotte on Geordie Shore. “She’s walking
like John Wayne today,” observed Sophie. Let’s hope she won’t
need a visit to Dr Quinn, Medicine Woman.
*THEY had to make money out of garbage on The Apprentice.
Well it’s worked for Jeremy Kyle.
*PRINCE Philip was interviewed by BBC1 for his ninetieth birthday.
Old, unreasonable, full of absurd political views...that’s the
Beeb. The Duke still adds to the gaiety of the nation.
* DAWN French has lost five stone of useless flab. Twenty-five
if you include Lenny...
BOFFINS creates anti-matter last week. That’s nothing, the
BBC1 sitcom department churn out anti-humour every week. Scientists
are now investigating an even greater mystery: the physics of
Arlene Phillips’s face.
RIP James Arnes, best known as the cowboy hero of Gunsmoke,
a star from the time when men were men, not bawling metrosexual
THE Hoff is famous largely for boozing, talking to his car
and giving the world Pamela Anderson. It’s hard to dislike him.
But his new reality series The Hasselhoffs sucks like a Dyson.
We want hell-raising, not wiener jokes! I’d suggest reviving
Baywatch, but I’m not sure Dave could suck his gut in for an
RANDOM irritations: assisted suicide storylines on soaps –
a dangerous game. BBC News’ metric obsession. Chris Moyles on
C4’s Comedy Gala, arsing about as a fat Freddie Mercury. Next
year, try booking comics.
SMALL joys of TV: Crazy Kraut Mrs. Tee (Four In A Bed). Rich
Hall’s moving song about being in love with a girl in the KKK.
Angry Boys. Edna’s transformation for You’re Fired: she went
from Edna Average to Grace Jones style rubber-gloved dominatrix.
Sweet dreams are made of this.
June 5. SIMON Cowell has called in the cops over shock Britain’s
Got Talent allegations. A malicious internet joker is claiming
the ITV show is an actual talent contest, and that someone who
isn’t a singer or a dancer has a chance of winning it. It’s
outrageous. They’ll be saying Cowell doesn’t manipulate the
Simon returned as Superman last week. Hurrah! Unfortunately
most of the contenders were pure Kryptonite. We got underperforming
dogs (not you, Buddy) table-tappers, mother-smothered kids,
poor pointless Popeye, and a dancer who mimed between changing
clothes. That karaoke Terminator was so ropy it’s a wonder the
real Terminator wasn’t sent back from the future to rip out
his larynx at birth, and then impregnate Girls Roc and Britney
lookalike Lorna Bliss. Lorna had a voice as limp as Robbie Williams
without his pills; she’s Lorna Far From Bliss.
Some of the decisions made you think they’d all been swigging
nail polish remover. How did very ordinary cabaret organist
Jean Martyn beat amazing magic act David & Karen into the finals?
How did that stone-deaf, doddery old pensioner with the attractive
female companion get past the auditions? Did ITV think, well,
it works for Strictly Come Dancing?
BGT combines the fairness of FIFA with all the fun of an Albert
Square kidnapping. There were acts with real potential, too
of course. Mimic Les Gibson was my favourite, although he blew
it last night; and I liked the Circus of Horror and Pip from
Pip & Pup. Others were either recruited directly from YouTube
or stole their routines from there. Edward Reid impressed anyone
who’d never heard the radio comedy staple ‘one song to the tune
of another’. Nathan’s “unique” toast art has already been done
by Lennie Payne. The show was nobbled by nitwit novelty acts
and over-paid judges with no critical faculties. Without Cowell,
this series was like True Blood without vampires.
Talent shows need his kind of caustic honesty. Yet even Simon’s
not perfect. He doesn’t know variety, he hates comedy. All he
really gets is a narrow strain of pop. Cowell’s eyes lit up
when he saw Ronan and New Bounce because he understands how
to make money out of singers. Full stop. BGT can’t unearth the
kind of stars previous talent shows discovered because its values
are corrupted. It’s too Britain’s Got Nutters, too much about
the idiot judges, too much about lining Simon’s already over-stuffed
pockets. (I’ve seen the contracts). Britain has got talent,
but ITV can’t find it.
*DID you watch that miserable excuse for talent on ITV yesterday?
Talk about ten over-hyped losers. But enough about the England
game. At least Jack Wilshere put some effort into it.
*IT’D be harsh to say that Girls Roc put the ‘tart’ in fire-starters.
But their outfits definitely put the semi in semi-finals. I
hear paramedics were on stand-by in case of singed minge.
SCOTT & Bailey are the least convincing female detectives
since drag night at Sun Hill. Clueless DC Rachel Bailey hadn’t
clocked that her boyfriend of two years was married to someone
else. D’oh! While DC Janet Scott cracked a big murder case because
she recognized a similar bunch of flowers to the one the killer
had left by the corpse in a petrol station forecourt. Yeah,
cos that’s the thing about petrol stations flowers, they’re
always so distinctive. If you spot North Staffs daffs mixed
with Watford Gap tulips, you can trace the killer’s route right
back to the All-Men-Are-Bastards depot...
OK, so Doctor Who’s River Song was Amy Pond’s grown-up baby
all along...and Little Melody was part Time Lord because she’d
been conceived in the Tardis on Amy and Rory’s wedding night.
Yeah, right. Tell it to the Child Support Agency, Doc.
*WHY did Amy say Melody’s Dad was known on earth as the Last
Centurion? After the Doc rebooted the universe, that plastic
Auton version of Rory had never existed.
HOT on TV: Game Of Thrones... Modern Family finale... Queen
- Days Of Our Lives.
ROT on TV: Scott & Bailey – Cagney & Lassie... Jack Dee upstaged
by a pig (Lead Balloon)... Stewart Lee’s Comedy Vehicle – as
pointless as Chris Huhne’s driving licence.
NEXT on Diagnosis Live: Sepp Blatter – a mental condition
that causes deluded waffling, extreme vanity and moral blindness.
Feargal Sharkey – fungus growing between the toes. Hasselhoff
Syndrome – a tendency to swing wildly between confusion and
extreme enthusiasm. Can be cured, and caused, by alcohol.
*C4’s Diagnosis Live is too tame to shock. Up the ante, give
us Drunken Cosmetic Surgery Live! Your operation’s free, but
your surgeon’s plastered. Sip/Tuck, Slip/F***ed.
*SHOCKING scenes on Corrie last week – freckle-fright Fiz,
naked in the shower. The horror! Otherwise it was business as
usual in ITV’s everyday story of murderers, body-snatchers and
*IF mad hostage-taker Snape had met a double would he have
kept himself to himself? Other Corrie mysteries: how many social
workers make non-emergency visits on a Bank Holiday?
*A Chinese golfer won the Open. That’s two words you don’t
often see together, ‘Chinese’ and ‘open’... except in the context
of takeaways, and Xin’s legs on Corrie.
*YUSEF got stuck into an old boot on EastEnders. And after
snogging Denise he got kidnapped.
*EGYPT’S Lost Cities was too dumbed down to take seriously,
but many shallow male viewers would love a crack at turning
Liz Bonnin into a mummy.
*I WAS mesmerised by Bums, Boobs and Botox. But enough about
the BGT judges...
I LOVE the comedians on Talking Funny – Seinfeld, Chris Rock,
Gervais, Louis CK, these fellas are at the top of their game.
But I once spent a night with Mick Miller, Chubby Brown, Bobby
Ball, Buddy Lee and Johnnie Casson in the Queens hotel, Blackpool,
and hand on heart that was funnier.
*THAT poor woman in the papers last week with a chronic fear
of men, do you think she’s head of drama at ITV?
RANDOM irritations: Tweet-obsessed Stephen Fry moaning that
he’s over-exposed. Cheryl Cole overkill. There are shop window
mannequins with better judgement (and probably better voices)
than mime artist Cheryl. What’s Cole got in common with the
Daleks? They’ll both be back.
SMALL joys of TV: Classic Chaplin clips (Paul Merton’s Birth
Of Hollywood). Loveable loony Lynn (Four In A Bed). Batman re-runs
(ITV4). Vince’s ‘Easy Jet’ shirt and tie combo (The Apprentice).
Vince doing for dog food what Spanish cucumbers do to Germans
- Pedigree Dumb. JANET Street-Porter reacted badly to honest
criticism on Celebrity Britain’s Best Dish, but that can’t have
been the first time she’s ruined someone rhubarb.
*SEPARATED at birth: Ratko Mladic’s wife and decrepit C4 madam
Lillian Tyler – both utterly Shameless.
*WILL BBC2 follow The Men Who Won’t Stop Marching with The
Men Who Won’t Stop Bombing? Thought not.